Let’s cut to the chase
Heartbreaks are very painful.
There is no need mincing words on that.
We might, indeed, want to act all tough – which is cool – but at least, we can all agree that when you give your heart to someone and they trample over it, it will hurt.
But we also can’t afford to stay hurt; we have to move on and deal.
Easier said than done … I know … but necessary
So, what are the tips to get over heartbreak?
Forgive: I must admit, forgiving a trusted person who hurt you is easier said than done but also very necessary.
If you must successfully move on, you have to let the person go and free your heart of all bitterness and pain.
A lot of people withhold forgiveness because they think they are gifting the other party whereas forgiveness is actually for yourself.
The truth is that whether you have forgiven someone or not might have no bearing on their life; they will be living their lives and you will be battling with bitterness.
So, it is really for yourself, so you can heal. It is painful, yes but if you don’t want to keep being in pain, forgive.
Learn from it: There is always a lesson to pick from whatever life situation we experience and if we fail to learn it early, we will keep having a repeat of that situation.
Now, don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying you have a fault or should take any blame – even though I would suggest being honest with yourself and take responsibility if there is indeed any part you should take responsibility.
What I am saying is that you should look critically and think about what life is trying to teach you from that incident.
Maybe what you should learn is not ignore the red flags or your guts next time, but whatever it is, make sure you pick up a lesson from it and move on.
Give yourself time to heal: You spent time with that person, so yeah, one of my tips to get over a heartbreak will not be to tell you to move on quickly.
You should indeed move on but don’t be too hard on yourself if it doesn’t happen immediately.
The most important thing is that you need to make progress but don’t try to rush the process.
Take your time; it is only a matter of time before you can think back on the incident and not feel crushed.
Avoid keeping contact: For the sake of your sanity, stay away from any and everything that reminds you of the person.
After heartbreak, it is not uncommon to find people stalking their ex on social media, so they can keep up with their lives; see if they are also miserable.
It is a trap; don’t fall for it. In fact, you are not taking it too far if you delete all memories of them and unfriend or unfollow them on social media.
Your healing will come faster if you do not constantly have to deal with your ex.
Spend time with loved ones: One of the tips to get over heartbreak is to spend time with people who love and care about you.
You might be going through blame game, insecurity of a period of low self-esteem, so you need people around who will boost your confidence.
You also need people who will make you smile and help you heal; don’t underestimate the power of being around love to help you get over heartbreak.
Live: There are probably a lot of things you would have wanted to accomplish but never had the time.
Now, that you have some time freed up, catch up on them. Go through your bucket list, travel, read, hang out with friends, volunteer, join a community.
Whatever it is you decide to do, just make sure you are actually living.
In conclusion, I would personally not advice dating immediately; I think you should heal first before doing that. There is, however, no standard duration I would suggest but make sure you are ready before you join the dating bandwagon.
And remember, there is someone out there who will love you the way you deserve, so don’t give up on love.