You have probably heard it said that men are not emotional – which is untrue anyway – and so, for many years, we erroneously believe they don’t need affection as much as women do.
Some men, sadly, have also bought into this narrative and not only have they suppressed their need to be loved, they actually talk about it.
Whether your man knows he needs to be loved or not, he does need to be loved. And if you are wondering how to go about it, I have highlighted some action points that will help you make your man feel loved.
How to Make Your Man Feel Loved
For some reason, we believe only women love to be complimented. But this couldn’t be further from the truth.
Men also want to be complimented, especially by the women they love. And you don’t need to pressure yourself to compliment him. You shouldn’t feel pressured to drop insincere compliments; that’s not what I’m saying here.
Just voice it out anytime you think he looks good. I’m sure there are many times when you thought he looked good, times when you noticed his hair cut and figured he looked hot but never voiced it out because you probably felt it wasn’t necessary.
Resolve in your heart to start letting him know anytime it crosses your mind.
Who doesn’t want to be appreciated? Everybody loves a good encouragement now and then. I’m sure there are things your guy does that you don’t like or appreciate; that’s normal because he is not perfect, just like you are not.
But we usually always feel the need to let people know their wrong without appreciating the good things they do as well.
Don’t be that woman who nags him to death about what you don’t appreciate and say nothing about what you do appreciate about him. Constantly affirm him and let him know how grateful you are for all he does.
ALSO READ: WHAT LOVE IS NOT
Be His Cheerleader
If you are not his number one fan, who will?
Be his support system, supporting his dreams and passion.
Basically, be on the front row of his shows.
Motivate and encourage him and let him know you are there to help in any way he needs you to. And if he simply needs a soundboard to listen to his ideas, be that for him.
Listen and Pay Attention to Him
Pay attention to him.
When he is talking to you, let him know he has your undivided attention. That’s not the time to be on social media but to pay attention to what he is saying.
However, besides that, pay attention to what he says. Imagine how you would feel if he gets you a gift or does something thoughtful because you mentioned it; that’s exactly how he feels as well.
It shows you really care about knowing him and what makes him tick.
In this world where many women expect and accept the worst from their man, show him that you trust him to do right by you.
I’m not saying trust a man that is not worthy of trust and you shouldn’t be with such a man in the first place. However, if he has given you no reason to distrust you, it will hurt him that he doesn’t have your trust.
By all means, let him earn your trust if you just met him, but don’t close your heart to it if he is worth it.
On the other hand, talking to him about your issues and respecting his opinions shows him you trust him.
ALSO READ: HOW TO REBUILD TRUST IN A RELATIONSHIP
Show Him Affection
One of the misconceptions we seem to have about men is that they don’t need affection because apparently to “experts”, men are logical and women are emotional. This is obviously false like I stated earlier.
Men, just like women, are emotional and women, just like men, are logical. The only difference is that men, over time, have been taught to exercise their logical side more while women are allowed to exercise their emotional side.
Thankfully, some men are beginning to realise that there is nothing wrong with being emotional. But if you have a man who doesn’t ask for affection because he still thinks it’s a sign of weakness, please still show him affection.
He needs it and he will appreciate you for it even though he doesn’t voice it out or doesn’t know he does.
Touch him just because, tell him you love him as much as possible and just be generally affectionate.
Nobody wants to be with someone who has made it their mission to change them. Yes, we are all imperfect and we have certain flaws we should definitely work on but we also know it is easier said than done.
In fact, we can’t even change ourselves, only the Holy Spirit can, so imagine breathing down someone’s neck to change when they can’t do it themselves.
He will get frustrated if you try to change him.
If he has flaws you can’t handle, the best thing is not to be in a relationship with him. But that which you can handle, accept, and if at all, encourage change through your actions and with love, not accusations.
However, remember not to get frustrated, if even that doesn’t work.
Give Him Space
Yes, occasional space is important in a healthy relationship.
Monitoring him and clinging to him might seem like a sign of love to you, but to him, it will come off as a disturbance.
Let him have his time alone and with his guys, especially when he asks for it and is not unreasonable about it.
If he doesn’t want to spend any time with you, that’s a problem. But if he just needs some me-time or time with his friends or family, it is completely reasonable.
ALSO READ: SIGNS YOU ARE IN A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
Get Him Gifts
Buy him gifts just because.
I want to believe you are not one of those women who don’t gift your man during events and celebrations but gifting should not be limited to only “special” days.
Did you see something that made you think of him? Get it for him if you can afford it.
It doesn’t have to be birthdays and anniversaries; you can gift him just because you love him and want to make him smile.
And you don’t even have to break the bank to do this. The best gifts are not usually the most expensive but the most thoughtful.
ALSO READ: SHORT STORY: GIFT AND ITS POWER
In conclusion, a lot of men will not ask for this because like I already stated several times, they have been taught not to ask for affection. However, since we know better, we should do better. If you implement all you have read here on how to make your man feel loved, you will have to yourself a very satisfied and happy man.