Should you play hard to get?
This question is something every woman has asked herself at some point in her life. Should I or should I not play hard to get?
For many years, the answer was obvious; the harder you play to get, the more value the guy places on you.
I used to think this way and I’m sure many in my generation felt the same way; you could hardly blame us, that was what we were taught.
I quickly discarded this belief many years back when my brother asked a lady he really liked out and she told him she was in a relationship.
I told him that the fact she SAID she is in a relationship doesn’t mean she is; she could just be playing hard to get and he shouldn’t give up.
He insisted he was letting her go. According to him, he didn’t have the time to play games; if she said she was in a relationship, as far as he was concerned, that means she was in a relationship.
I remember that discussion giving me a pause; have we been lied to? Do guys enjoy the chase as we have been told? Is playing hard to get effective?
If you ask me, I will say there was a time when it was, when even the guys didn’t mind the girl playing hard to get.
But times have changed; guys have seen that they can do without the games.
These days, playing hard to get is not advisable; in fact, it is counterproductive.
When you are a teenager or early twenties, you probably can risk it but once you get to a stage where you are looking for something serious, you will be giving off a vibe of immaturity.
Guys who are done with the games, who are serious and looking to settle down do not have the time to figure out whether you are interested in them or not when you are sending mixed signals.
And let me be quite blunt; playing hard to get is even manipulative. You have to act like you are not interested, then quickly reel the guy in if you find out he is losing interest.
That is just too much stress when your no can be no and your yes can be yes.
If you like a guy or you are interested in knowing him better before making a decision, let him know and if you aren’t, let him know as well.
That way, nobody is wasting anybody’s time and you can concentrate on finding a real and strong connection with someone that can result in a healthy relationship.